we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Do you remember whose house we're in?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
