Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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