Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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