what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
