dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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