i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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