ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
