he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
