new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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