when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
