Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize