a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
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