When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Randomize
