How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
