I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
