Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Randomize
