Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Randomize
