There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
