This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Randomize
