Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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