Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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