I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Apparently you make a good broom.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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