Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize