I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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