But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
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