My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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