What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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