How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
