Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
