The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Two words: nipple clamps
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