On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
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