question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
