Just cropdusted the office
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
