Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize