Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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