But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
