Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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