They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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