he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
