i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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