how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
