I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
It's never too late to be topless.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Randomize