Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
