I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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