you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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