So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I don't deserve a penis
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
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