you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
The dick lei will go down in squad history
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
