Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Randomize