She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
