Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
