I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Randomize