What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
