New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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